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TEXTS & COMMUNICATION · 0:18

Do not send the defensive paragraph

“Are you serious right now?” Shock, disbelief, or feeling blindsided. Try this: I can hear that landed badly. What part surprised or upset you most? Send this to the person who drafts the four-paragraph reply. Self-help only — not therapy, diagnosis, or emergency support.

Three takeaways

  1. Shock, disbelief, or feeling blindsided.
  2. Responding to the tone before understanding the concern.
  3. Escalating with “yes, obviously.”
  4. I can hear that landed badly. What part surprised or upset you most?

Video transcript

You said: Are you serious right now? Shock, disbelief, or feeling blindsided. Responding to the tone before understanding the concern. Try this: I can hear that landed badly. What part surprised or upset you most?